Father’s Day

Posted on June 16, 2013 by Wendy Cooper

Our Father’s Day were supposed to be spent out at the cabin enjoying the peace and quiet. It’s been quite a month for us as it is a month since Jordon quit his job at The Lighthouse and found a new job but is still doing what he loves and is pretty excited about new challenges. So are we.

Instead of going to the cabin on Friday night, Jordon informed me that we were going to the wedding of our good friends Bert Lang and Don Lafreniere. Don is quite ill with cancer and the wedding was a total last minute surprise, even for Don and Bert. The wedding was in a suite at the Holiday Inn and we joined a small group of their friends and family who put together a nice wedding on about 28 hours notice.

Of course with Bert being ill and just about ready to move into palliative care, I shed a lot of tears but we had a wonderful time. So while we didn’t make it to the gay pride parade (we were frantically looking for gifts and getting reading for the wedding), we were at marriage for two dear friends.

As I mentioned, today was the gay pride parade today in Saskatoon. I don’t always understand the nuances of politics like Jordon does but I do appreciate the stand that 8 of Saskatoon’s city councillors took when they took out this ad and marched in the parade. As we were leaving, we ran into one of the grooms downstairs and he was just saying that a guy who was there was so homophobic that he couldn’t even listen to the story of Bert and Don’s marriage. Homophobia is alive and well in Saskatoon.

Later this morning Mark and Oliver get along really well with Bert and Don so we are taking the boys to visit Bert in St. Paul’s Hospital later this morning where we are told to sneak in cold Coca-Cola into Bert. Since Coke is the only thing he can consume, we took him up a small cooler to keep it cold in. The nurses can get him ice which m

Before we leave to see Bert, we did have a chance to celebrate Father’s Day with Jordon.

Jordon is a great father to the boys. He has also taught me a lot about being a better parent. He is pretty much impossible to manipulate, understands the boys really well, and can be fun when he needs to be and firm when it is called for as well. The boys are lucky to have Jordon as their dad. If you ask Jordon, he says that he is lucky to have two great kids.

For Father’s Day the boys got him a reciprocating saw. We want to do some projects with the wood from pallets and to take them apart, you need a good saw. This could also be a gift for me as I am the one that wants to do some stuff with pallet wood so we all win at this. Well I win. The more I think about it, I think Jordon could end up losing. Sorry about that babe.

We all pitched in an got him a pair of Bose AE2 around the ear headphones with my, err, our AirMiles. Jordon loves his Bose in the ear headphones and the sound on the AE2 are even better. Even if I wanted these to be for me I don’t think I could pry them off his head or out of his hands.

From me, I bought him a dual sided barbecue grill topper with a griddle on one side and a flat surface on the other. According to the barbecue cookbooks, they are ideal for doing hamburgers on and I am really curious what it is like to grill on.

The dog got him a Hydro Power razor and some Snow Power cologne from Swiss Army. Yes that cologne bottle is reinforced and has a carabiner on it so if he goes mountain climbing, he will be able to take it with him.

Maggi was concerned that wasn’t gift enough so she got into the garbage and spread it through the house. Nothing says, “Happy Father’s Day” like garbage in the house. We are thinking of trading her in for a racoon. Of course Mark see’s the carnage the throws up all over the place. Nothing says Father’s Day to Jordon like having to clean up his son’s vomit.

Of course Jordon goes “bad dog” and immediately Maggi climbs up on his lap (her admission of guilt) until he pets her or says, “It’s all right”. Last night that was a little slow coming so we had a dog underfoot for part of it.

It’s good to be together as a family. Tonight we are trying to make a spicy perogy pizza. I’ll let you know how it turns out.

I hope your Father’s Day is a good one.

Mother’s Day at the Cabin

Posted on May 12, 2013 by Wendy Cooper

Mother's Day Gift

Well the boys surprised me with a new patio table set for the cabin. It’s small but we only have a 8×8 deck and of course we are a small family. We also have a picnic (or picinic if you are Yogi Bear) table and some other chairs if more friends drop by so we will be okay. We already had a base for the umbrella so we are good to go. We have a matching side table which complements it nicely. I can’t wait for the weather to be consistently nice enough to use it. Of course Jordon, Mark, and Oliver already ran the deck box up to the lake so we have a head start on outdoor living.

They also gave me a stacked drink dispenser which we will keep at the cabin.

Jordon picked me up a cookbook called Complete Comfort Food by Bridget Jones.

We tried this Whiskey RIbeye Marinade Recipe and didn’t like it. Tender steak but whiskey taste. Not a good combination if you are not a whiskey drinker. While we were there, we were able to stop by Dennis and Wilda Camplin’s place where I was all inspired by their painting (I need to do more of it this year).

Around here

Posted on May 3, 2013 by Wendy Cooper

I haven’t posted much lately about life. Maybe because until this week it was still winter in Saskatoon and I was just tired of it. That being said, we have been busy around here.

As Mark posted, he is in the process of leaving Caswell School and heading to Westmount where he is applying to be part of the Let’s Lead program. He is really looking forward to exploring Saskatchewan and pushing himself.
I posted about the deck box. Jordon, Mark, and Oliver ran it up to the cabin last weekend along with some supplies that will go a long way in opening up the cabin. Oliver was mad they didn’t stay long but was placated when they let him play with Mark’s TouchPad.
We are spending Mother’s Day up there.
We did manage to get the lawn raked and mowed. It isn’t looking that bad but it does need some warmer weather and fertilizer. After that is done we start painting and fixing the fence. Then once June comes, we hit it with weed and feed to stop the onslaught of dandelions that will be coming from the abandoned lot behind us. Somehow the city’s infill guidelines need to ban dandelions as an option.
The picket fence on the house needs to be repainted. Both Jordon and I want to just get rid of it but that will be a pain as well. I think we will fix it, paint it and then hate ourselves for doing it.

How to grill the perfect steak

Posted on May 3, 2013 by Wendy Cooper

Over at the cabin blog, Jordon posts some advice on how to grill up the perfect steak.

The deck box

Posted on April 21, 2013 by Wendy Cooper

After wanting one for a couple of years for the cabin, we finally picked up a deck box today. After looking around at a bunch of places and finding ourselves unimpressed with what $100 will get you, we decided to get a Rubbermaid Roughneck Jumbo Storage Tote for $20. I realized that I didn’t want the kids to get into it and the racoons often wreak havoc at Arlington Beach. The last thing I wanted to do was buy $100 wicker deck box and have something eat through it. It’s big enough to keep balls, nets, and outside stuff out of the way and organized and cheap enough that if it gets wrecked, I won’t feel bad about it. Plus, this is water proof and the fake wicker boxes are not.

Once we close the cabin up for the winter, it will come inside so as long as I can keep Oliver off it, I can’t see it taking that much abuse. Of course the bad part about not purchasing a fold down box is that it won’t fit in the trunk of the Mazda and has to go in the back seat. I have to work on Saturday so the guys plan to take it and a load of clean bedding up to the cabin on Saturday and start the process of opening it up.

The week that was

Posted on November 18, 2012 by Wendy Cooper

Growing up we had a pretty simple family ritual. We came home, cooked dinner together, ate, and then watched television. On Sundays we went to church and occasionally we drove across the United States for a family wedding or when someone was sick. That was it. We went out once a year on Chinese for my grandfather’s birthday and that was it. Family life was functional and we all did our own things. I have long said I grew up in a collection of individuals rather than as a family.

When I married Jordon, he is a part of a family and our friends were all parts of family and that is a much different dynamic than I ever grew up with. It’s great being on the receiving end of that kind of family. Jordon will plan vacations, evenings out, and things like birthdays and Christmas. He does a good job of doing stuff with the boys and I just have to tag along and that is what I have done.

I have been married for 15 years to Jordon and have been a mother for 12 years and I have never planned an evening out or an outing for the boys. I do take them to things but that is because Jordon organizes and kind of forces me to go along. Left to my own devices, I would probably do what my parents did. Cook supper and then watch television.

For me, it’s a great life because I get to care about myself and I don’t have to do anything but eventually the world becomes a really, really lonely place because I don’t pay attention to relationships. As a INTP, not caring comes naturally.

As an INTP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things rationally and logically. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

The INTP may have a problem with self-aggrandizement and social rebellion, which will interfere with their creative potential. Since their Feeling side is their least developed trait, the INTP may have difficulty giving the warmth and support that is sometimes necessary in intimate relationships. If the INTP doesn’t realize the value of attending to other people’s feelings, he or she may become overly critical and sarcastic with others. If the INTP is not able to find a place for themself which supports the use of their strongest abilities, they may become generally negative and cynical. If the INTP has not developed their sensing side sufficiently, they may become unaware of their environment, and exhibit weakness in performing maintenance-type tasks, such as bill-paying and dressing appropriately.

In other words I am pretty self absorbed and that is my natural state. It may make me pretty low maintenance but it sucks for those close to me. When you add on the depression that never goes away, it takes a toll, especially on Jordon.

WIth everyone else, Jordon can remind me to call, email, or socialize. It’s not that I don’t like people, it is that I just never initiate social things or bother to maintain things with people, even those closest to me. Friends come through Saskatoon all of the time, email me about it and I never get back to them. It drives Jordon crazy. I don’t like Facebook because I realize that I don’t like keeping up with people, despite having long friendships with them. Years ago it came up in counselling over my depression and it has never gotten any better. I would get lists of things to improve my interpersonal relationships with. I would go home, post them on the fridge and not do a single thing on the list. It’s a part of me that I hate.

The other characteristic that I share with my family is when I am in the wrong, I want to be punished for it rather than work through anything. While I know I don’t treat Jordon and the boys well, there is a loud voice inside of me that says that they are better off without me. To make a long story short, that is where I have been the last several months. Jordon and the boys would be better off without me which doesn’t anything to improve things with all of us. I punish myself by taking it out on them.

A couple of days ago I got really angry at Jordon for essentially not doing his own Christmas shopping for his own gifts. He takes care of all of the other gifts but the nerve of himself for not making my only task really easy for myself. I ended up escalating it until I demanded a divorce, contacted mediators, informed Jordon I didn’t love him and decided to move out. I found a place to rent and was going to move out today and spend the rest of my life in isolation.

On top of being introverted and rather selfish, the depression brings a level of delusion to my life and relationships. It keeps me from actually dealing with anything because my reality wins out. I remember telling my parents of the abuse that I went through as a kid and they kept going back to a card I made in grade 2 that talked about being happy and they were the best parents ever. That card trumped everything I was telling them. At other times they would tell me things that “I” told them in a dream which again trumped what I was saying.

I realized that as I get older, I do the same thing to Jordon and the boys and when I am confronted with what is reality, I want to flee rather than deal with it because I guess in the end I think I deserve to be alone.

Friday night after telling Jordon off via text message for no reason I called him to let him know I would need the car. He had stopped by Midtown Mall where he was shopping for a gift for Mark and just calmly had me pick him up. I was still mad and frustrated and was willing to throw away the best relationship I have ever had when he just said, “When you are done acting like your parents, let me know and we can work things out”. It snapped me back from the edge and I realized what I was doing and continue to do. The big decision that I find myself facing day in and day out is do I want the kind of family I walked away from or do I want actual relationships with people and be part of something else?

Of course I want to be a part of family and I do love Jordon and the boys and our friends, it’s that I subconsciously default to, “I need to be punished and live by myself”.

Jordon has an ability to be both forgiving and unimpressed with me. My therapist has said that the only reason we are still married is his ability to hit a reset switch. Yesterday he had every right to help me pack and move me out but instead we drove to the cabin where we had to pick up some things. We stopped by Best Buy because Mark was worried about wrecking his iPod Nano and Jordon found him a case that will do until more Nano cases come out and then spent 4 hours in the car broken up by 10 minutes at the lake.

It’s weird. 15 years of marriage comes down to Jordon’s incredible ability to wait me out and deescalate my depression and delusional state of mind.

A nice end to a horrible summer

Posted on September 4, 2012 by Wendy Cooper

We just got back from the cabin where we didn’t do a lot. On Sunday we drove into Regina for a bit where we went to Chapters and bought a couple of Christmas gifts and then we spent some time fighting some massive waves at the beach before heading back to the cabin for a nice fire. Today we spent fixing some things and then taking Mark’s BB gun and our Airsoft pistols out for some target practice.

Mark’s BB gun shoots very straight while our Airsoft pistols aren’t nearly so accurate.

When we weren’t swimming or shooting at things, we spent a lot of time hauling water for our four new green ash trees that we planted this spring. They are doing really well and now the challenge will be protecting them from the deer that tend to eat everything at the lake.

We haven’t been up there that much. My depression came back with a vengeance this summer and I pretty much killed some pretty great trips because of it. It moved from a severe depressive disorder to a bi-polar and part of that was a significant medication change. The new medication I am on is apparently extremely dangerous which means that I had to be weaned off the old stuff and then slowly introduced to this new stuff and then get examined every week for side effects. It also meant that it took me a long time to get up to the dosage that I need to function with. In the end I had worsening depression and was essentially off my medications. It has not been a fun time.

Jordon was wonderful (if not beaten down by it) and helped me through a lot of situations that were causing me problems. While he helped me pull it together sometimes, there was a lot of times he couldn’t do anything to help me except to clean up the chaos; kind of like most summers. As Mark has gotten older, it has taken a bigger toll on him. He has a propensity towards the same kind of depression I had as a kid and my depression affects him. It isn’t fun to see your mother live like this. I saw my father struggle with depression and it affected me. Several friends have shared their stories of seeing a parent deal with the same stuff.

This weekend however things came together. Jordon kind of willed it to happen. He kept me focused on what he wanted me to do and I got it done. It was a busy weekend for him with The Lighthouse opening up a new tower and the Escape with Ford event but we pulled it together and I am happy that it turned out well.

We all sound better

Posted on June 30, 2012 by Wendy Cooper

Back in 2011, Lee gave Jordon a gift certificate for Best Buy for his birthday. Jordon went out and bought some iHome portable speakers that sounded great. This year we gave Mark some Hype rechargeable portable speakers which are a similar concept and design. Today Jordon picked me up a Headrush Pop Up Speaker which is a rechargeable mini speaker which gives out an incredible sound and it was on for half price.

When Jordon and I were first married, all I wanted was a really great component stereo system. Jordon won that argument we never got the stereo system that would wake the neighbours (Jordon hates loud music) Despite not having the biggest and best stereo system, Jordon has always done a great job is keeping me in stock with great music, good headphones, and fun speakers like that that make listening to music a lot of fun. Unless you have listened some of these mini speakers, you have no idea how great of sound they produce. It won’t replace my sound dock anytime soon but it will be a constant companion for my laptop.

While we were out today, I did buy Jordon two watched from The Source. One is a dress watch and the other one is a scrolling LED watch that I will have to post a video of to appreciate. (Note: The one watch didn’t have a manual for it. Jordon went to the website and was able to quickly find it and download it which is awesome)

Mark did pass grade 6 and his marks were pretty good (not perfect but decent). To celebrate his report card and to kick off summer, we bought Mark a PS3 game that has all three of Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell games on it. Stealth and Mark don’t aways go hand in hand so we will see how he does.

Finally on the way home we stopped by Staples where I got a really cool ceramic tumbler coffee and tea mug that was been blown out.

Tomorrow we will head to the cabin for a bit to drop some stuff off. We are lending the cabin to Jared Siebert for the week and we thought it was the week of Family Camp but it’s not. We had planned to go up today but after the stress of a horrible week, it was better to take some time around here. I want to bring some stuff up, hang some blinds, and we will chill out for a while until it’s time for the Sieberts to get there before heading back home.

I work Monday at Safeway and Jordon is going in to upgrade some computers at The Lighthouse so that is our weekend. I hope your Canada Day long weekend is a good one as well.

Easter

Posted on April 6, 2012 by Wendy Cooper

We had planned to go out to the cabin this weekend but there is a weather warning for the lake so it isn’t going to happen. As Environment Canada says

An intensifying low pressure system is forecast to track northeastward out of Wyoming today, across the southeast corner of Saskatchewan tonight, then into Central Manitoba on Saturday. Precipitation is already spreading northward across Southern Saskatchewan today, mostly in the form of rain and even with some thunderstorm activity in the southeast. In the southwest, snow has moved into the Shaunavon region where it will continue much of the day along with strengthening north winds and some reduced visibilities later today due to blowing snow. The rain is expected to either be mixed with, or change over to snow in the Assiniboia, Moose Jaw, Humboldt and Wynyard areas during the day today, while northeastern grainbelt regions will continue as rain at least for today. The snow will move out of the southwest tonight, but in areas farther northeast the area of snow is expected to intensify and gradually shift eastward by Saturday morning into the east-central grainbelt. On Saturday the area of snow will move out of the province late in the day. The snow tonight and Saturday will be accompanied by strong north or northwest winds of 40 to 60 km/h with higher gusts. This will result in widespread blowing snow and near zero visibilities in many areas. Total snowfall amounts of 20 to 40 cm are likely in the hardest hit areas. Current indications point to this area being north of Regina and Yorkton, and generally east of highway 2. As this system moves into the province today, and it becomes evident where the rain snow boundary sets up, the regions which have warnings could shift somewhat.

It’s actually okay as I am not feeling that great tomorrow. If the lake doesn’t get any snow, we may head up tomorrow but even if there isn’t, it’s no big deal. Last Easter we had summer like weather but this year it is freezing. Life in Saskatchewan I guess.

Since we are sticking around Saskatoon for the weekend, we ran some errands, got some groceries and checked out Zellers liquidation sale. It’s amazing that at 20%-40% off, it is still much more expensive than what Walmart is. I for one am glad that they got sold off to Target, even if the Conservative Party isn’t. We did get some nice cushions for the cabin though and I got some cute Olympic gear for the boys.

We did run to Walmart for a quick trip and for some groceries but we did pick up a couple of cheap upright floor lamps. Jordon wanted them for some poorly lit rooms at The Lighthouse. I am told that in the 1970s, there was some renovations made to the Capri Hotel and the rooms had a funky valance installed in the roof which looks really cool but it doesn’t allow a lot of light to disperse. I haven’t been in the rooms at night but Jordon has said that it is impossible to even read on the one side of the room, hence the need for lamps.

While Mark is at the age where he can read my blog, we picked up a couple of gifts for the boys. We got Oliver a child’s tennis racquet. He has been obsessed with Jordon’s new racquet and this way when we go to play some tennis, he can hit the ball around without wrecking our racquets. We also got him a red Power Ranger. While all of us hate the Power Rangers, he loves them. While we were out this weekend, Jordon bought some Vibram Fivefinger shoes.

First trip out to Arlington Beach

Posted on March 19, 2012 by Wendy Cooper

We had talked about heading out to the cabin a couple of weeks ago but it never came together. I was working yesterday but Jordon suggested we head out to the lake and bring a bunch of stuff out there in anticipation of opening up the cabin for the year. We have a bunch of new pillows for the lake so we brought 8 of those out, a heater, a new grill, and bought a bunch of non-perishable food items out. We got up early, did a Dollarama run, and hit the road and got out there for a few hours. The weather said that it was supposed to be 16 degrees in Govan (our nearest weather station) but I don’t think it got close to that. Being that close to the frozen Last Mountain Lake, didn’t help that much either, especially with the wind coming off the lake.

It was nice enough to go down to the beach and for a walk around. We didn’t notice a whole lot of changes except for our neighbors bringing in a great looking guest house which remakes our part of the neighbourhood.

The cabin is a lot drier than it has been in two years and the roads weren’t in bad condition and nothing like last year. The beach is actually visible and no cabins are threatened so it’s all good. Hopefully it is a lot more normal of year at the beach than it ever has been over the last two summers.

We measured, checked our measurements, and then checked then again and agreed on a 8×11 deck at the front of the cabin that will also serve as a front step. We will be putting a privacy railing with horizontal boards along the front as well. It will hold two Adirondack chairs and kind of be Jordon’s and my spot at the cabin. We are also adding a small 8 x 10 deck at the back for dining in the evening. Not sure if that will have a railing or not it will mean about another 170 square feet of space for the cabin. It’s not a lot but when the cabin is only around 300 square feet, it feels massive.

To go with the new deck, we are picking up a Cranston 6 piece patio set. The names sound pretentious but it’s a small and inexpensive patio set from Wal-Mart. The chairs fold up which means for easy storage in the winter which when you don’t have a shed, that’s a big deal. While it won’t be big enough to entertain with but we have the picnic table for that, plus it’s normally just the four of us when we are up there.

Luckily Lee has a new Dodge Truck that will carry some of the supplies up. It makes it a lot easier to get things done. That being said, it won’t take a whole weekend to build the two decks and it will only take one trip up.

WendyCooper.org

I used to have hobbies, now I have kids.

Tag Archives: The Cooper Cabin